Sometimes I think that vulnerability is the word that best sums up the experience of foreign travel. But vulnerability isn’t always negative, sometime good things result from being vulnerable. In the last post I wrote about connection, and the ability to truly connect with others requires an ability to be vulnerable. As Berné Brown said, “vulnerability is the birthplace of connection.” I couldn’t agree more!
We often think of connection and vulnerability in terms of deepening relationships but it is equally important to small connections and the foundations of relationships.
Being in a new area, often alone and not speaking the language, demands that you rely on others. From asking for directions, to ordering food, to interpreting rules. You are uniquely dependent. These interactions often lead to unexpected and memorable connections.
I recall strangers in Guatemala offering to share a room when a hostel was full, a bus driver in Costa Rica who altered his route drop me off at my destination when I was lost, and the sweetest old Greek man who couldn’t explain directions to us in English and decided to physically escort my friend and to our location 20 minutes out of his way. And, perhaps my favorite story, the friendship forged by the strangers who literally gave my grandma and me clothes when our luggage was lost in route to Russia!
I experienced vulnerability in a new way when I broke my ankle in Portugal. Being physically vulnerable added another layer of exposure. As I lay on the ground unable to move, alternating between the verge of tears and laughter, I experienced a wide range of reactions. Some people actually stepped over me while avoiding eye contact. Others interrupted their sightseeing to ask if I was okay and how they could help. The kindness of strangers, the compassion of the park employees, and the broken English jokes accompanied by impromptu Portuguese lessons from the charismatic firemen on the ambulance ride to the hospital transformed the experience. As did the countless strangers who pushed my wheelchair, opened doors for me when I was on crutches, and offered to carry my luggage at the airport. Sometimes these simple acts almost brought tears to my eyes. And they always made me feel incredibly thankful and connected.
While these interactions bring me joy, it saddens me to know that I often miss out on such interactions in the “real world”. When I am independent, self-sufficient and focused I often obliviously overlook these small opportunities to connect with others.
Read my other travel lessons here.
